More Emotional than CaRMS...

This is our last week of official classes. It's been interesting seeing how we all react to this major change in our lives. There is a lot of regret. People who haven't been hanging out with each other throughout these 4 years are regretting not getting to know each other better. Some of us went out for brunch on Sunday following a clean up. This was a real mixed bag of students - different groups who don't normally hang out. We found ourselves lingering long after brunch was done. We were having fun and didn't want it to end.

We are marking the events in our lives and able to say, this is the last time I will ... with my class. This is causing some extreme emotions.

Some are crying at the drop of a hat. Others are trying to form tight friendships with their new group of residents. Some are burning bridges (a strange way to make sure that it's OK they are leaving the province since "they hate everyone"?). We are smiling more, putting up with less. Saying the things that we are thinking, going to events that we don't normally attend. Cameras are flashing almost constantly.

For myself, I know that my emotions are very mixed. I've been seeing lots of the under-years and listening to them tell me why they'll miss me and my class. There are things that I still haven't done at school here. I don't like leaving projects half done and leaving this school for residency is going to be hard.

I've been the brunt of many people's anger and inability to deal with the stresses in their life. They are experiencing a lot of changes and pressures (MCCQE, finding new home for residency, filling out the piles and piles of paperwork for residency, distancing relationships, completing assignments, writing end of course tests, rehearsing for our variety show). It's odd that they seem to feel they are the *only* ones going through these stresses and therefore deserve to act like a child. I recognise that these changes are a difficult part of becoming an adult and am trying to be patient, but it gets harder and harder every day.

I've also been targeted for gush sessions where people tell me they don't know what they'll do without me next year. But these are the same people who are inviting everyone around me, but not me, out for beer. It's a little hard to take.

My class has been a family. There are brothers and sisters that I want to smack upside the head, others that I am incredibly proud of and want to snuggle on the couch with. We have had ups and downs together and have mostly made it through - I can imagine almost anyone in my class coming to pick me up on the 401 if my car was to break down.

Someone has called this emotional roller coaster the effect of graduation goggles. Everything has an expiry date on it now.

This will be a rough week on my mascara.